What I Wish My Clients Knew Before Trying to Lose Weight

Losing weight is hard.

If you’ve been trying to lose weight for any period of time, you don’t need me to tell you. You’ve experienced setbacks. You’ve dealt with sabotaging family members. You’ve worked hard and seen no results. I’m sure you’ve thought: “I wish I knew what I know now before I started losing weight.” As a health coach, I wish my clients had that same insight, too.

If you’re feeling discouraged about your progress or you’re just getting started: this is for you.

Your weight loss progress won’t be a straight downward line.

You’ll see the scale tick back up time and time again. This doesn’t mean you’ve failed or that what you’re doing isn’t working! Going up a pound or two overnight is rarely true weight gain. Hormonal fluctuations, water retention, inflammation, and increased exercise are a few culprits.  What matters more than those fluctuations is the general trend of your weight loss. I recommend using a graph to show your progress over time to help visualize this. Draw a line from your first weigh-in to your last one. Odds are, you’ll see you’re moving in the right direction.

Losing weight fast isn’t sustainable and often isn’t even possible.

In today's diet culture, there are endless weight-loss strategies that tout “low effort, high results”. With this mindset, after weeks of doing it the “right way”, you're upset about “only” losing a few pounds. Think for a second about how long it took for you to get to your current weight. Did it happen in two weeks, or did it happen over many months or even years? Give your body the chance to adjust to the changes you’re making before you throw in the towel. And on that note:

Change takes time.

If you start exercising today, you won’t lose weight tomorrow. You’re playing the long game: the changes you make to your habits may take weeks to pay off. This is why it’s so important to create habits that don’t make you miserable. You’ll need to stick with it for a while, so opt for changes that are intrinsically motivating. Find healthy foods you enjoy, not the salads you think you should be eating. Don’t run because you heard it speeds up your metabolism, go kayaking because you love being on the water. Many failed weight-loss attempts boil down to people doing what they think they should be doing and not what they actually enjoy.

Change will take time. Be patient with yourself and celebrate even the smallest bits of progress.

Losing weight isn’t worth sacrificing everything you love.

Life’s too short to never eat desserts again. If the changes you’d need to make to lose and maintain that loss would make you miserable, it’s not worth it.

Don’t over-restrict.

If you look forward to going back to “normal” once you hit your goals, it’s a sign you’re being too restrictive. If you’re missing certain foods or missing the free time you’d have if you stopped spending hours at the gym, you need to loosen things up. Find a balance between what you love and what will move you towards your goals. For example, I aim for meals that are 80% nutritious foods, and 20% less nutritious foods. That might look like a whole grain pita with roasted chicken, lettuce, and avocado as my 80%, and bacon and ranch dressing as my 20%.

Comparison really is the thief of joy.

I’ve seen clients get frustrated because they fought for a five-pound loss over three months while a friend dropped ten pounds in their first month. Roses and sunflowers are both beautiful in their own way: we don’t say the sunflower is more beautiful because it grows taller. Weight loss speed depends on endless factors. There’s no guarantee that those others are losing weight in a healthy way, or in a way that will allow them to keep it off long-term. 

Do your best to avoid comparing your weight loss to someone else’s. Everyone’s body and weight loss journey is unique!

Weight loss does not equal health gain.

Crash diets may try to draw you in (there’s a reason this is a billion-dollar industry!), but they’re not going to help you long-term. Think about how you feel on these diets. Chances are, you’re fatigued, irritable, hungry, and generally miserable. Crash diets are far more unhealthy than living with a few extra pounds. If you’re otherwise healthy, being clinically overweight also doesn’t necessarily mean you’d benefit from shedding those extra pounds. In fact, having healthy habits is more important, and some research indicates that losing weight for the sake of your health isn’t all it’s cracked up to be: 

You know what’s best for you.

If you’re trying to lose weight because your doctor told you that you should but you don’t feel it's necessary, get a second opinion. Trust your gut, it’s usually right. 

Love yourself first.

One of the hardest things about my job is that I meet a lot of people who hate their bodies. They pick at themselves and only see what they want to change about their reflection. If you’re navigating both the desire to lose weight and low self-esteem, I strongly encourage taking some time to reflect. I’ve noticed that self-esteem issues often don’t resolve once a person hits their goal weight. Their desire to lose weight is a symptom of low self-esteem. This means it’s going to take time and work outside of weight loss to be comfortable with yourself. It’s also important to still love yourself even while you’re losing weight. Be gentle and kind when things don’t go to plan.

Weight loss can be an emotionally painful process. You deserve self-love: always, and at any size.

Social Support is key.

Many people struggle with weight loss because their family or friends are unsupportive. If you feel comfortable, I recommend explaining your health goals to them and asking for support. If you don’t feel comfortable speaking directly to those around you, a therapist can help you craft a strategy for communicating your needs. If you have absolutely no support from those around you, you can hire a weight-loss professional for the extra accountability!

Most people need help.

I understand the urge to DIY your weight loss. It can feel like a luxury to work with a weight-loss professional, but you’re so much more likely to be successful. Health coaching in particular is linked to a higher rate of success for individuals trying to make lifestyle changes.